This Tickle is entitled, “Boy Scouts.” When I was a Boy Scout our troop prided itself on being cool. Because to everyone else in the world, being a Boy Scout really meant — “Losers That Like To Dress Up Like Nerd Soldiers and Go Camping Together.” The way I looked at it, it was a great way for dads to give their marriage some space and for boys to wreck havoc on nature. I remember I had a friend named Billy. And he was a ditz. He did whatever the older scouts wanted him to do. Like allowing himself to be put to sleep. The first time I saw this I was floored. They asked Billy to quickly run around the camp site — in order to get completely exhausted. Then one of the older boys came up behind him and put him in a sleeper hold. I had seen something like that on wrestling shows. But that was fake. And sure enough he passed out. And then they gently laid him on the ground. He woke up after a long, long ten seconds. And said “Cool!! I even remember what I dreamt!…I think I dreamt I was sleeping.”
After that, the older kids wanted me to try. But I was too scared that I wouldn’t wake up. So instead we indulged in more appropriate Boy Scout activities. Like writing our names in the grass with insect repellent and setting it afire. Or enjoying the minor thrills of snorting blue Kool-Aid.